You, yes YOU!

It’s not easy when the world keep blaming us for our past mistakes. But I can handle this alone. I get over my past alone, try to forget everything. I almost done with this, but I keep repeating the same mistakes which I cannot handle this alone anymore. I smell the cigarettes almost every hour in my room even though I’m not a smoker. We smile to each other like nothing happen between us last year. Almost one month, and we’re never done.

Not all happy moments are happy for me. I might smile, but inside I cry. I know you’d feel the same too because I know inside your mind you’re thinking about someone which is not me. How hard to be me. I keep pretending almost everyday. My words are only words. And so do you. I know people like you very well dear. We’re all hypocrites and I never blame you on that. We can act like normal but inside we’re insulting each other. Aren’t we? I can read your mind, I know what the hell is going on between us. I know everything. Quit playing games, I said I’m done.

But for me, counting days until Saturday is everything. It much better to be someone’s secret friend rather than you’re hugging and kissing in front of people just to let know that you already have someone to love. I’d rather live alone, than facing faces like you every single day. Thanks for your existence, don’t worry no one know about us.

I have three. Don’t you get me?